du jour

Ugh.

I have a migraine today. I remember when Madee was weaning I had a migraine for 2 weeks. Apparently the hormones are working their way back into a regular rhythm, but I just have to say that it is days like this when I really wish I had some help around here.

Madee is CONSTANTLY YAMMERING. Sometimes I know what she is saying, sometimes I don't, but she will not stop talking. Whoever said "you spend 18 months trying to teach them how to walk and talk and the next 18 years trying to get them to sit down and shut up" was only kind of kidding.

Seriously. I remember my dad telling me "5 minutes. Please just be quiet for 5 minutes." I woul hardly even hear him over my own voice. "I bet you can't even do it,: he would challenge me. But he was right. So I deserve it, but I don't deserve this headache. And the constant squeaky up and down and incessant rambling emotion-practicing dramatic talking is only compounded by Eden's constant whining.

Not that she is sick or unhappy, but she gets upset anytime anyone move around the room without bringing her along. Every time she crawls into one room following us, we turn around and walk back to somewhere else, and this is maddening. And although I can usually accommodate or have patience for this, I HAVE A MIGRAINE. So I just want them to be quiet and go play in the other room.

MY EYE IS TWITCHING. I mean, how do you stop that from happening, anyway?

Also, Madee is "childproofing" the house which means she hands me everything to keep away from Eden. Babies, puzzles, stuffed animals, bins of toys, baby strollers, her potty, you name it. And if I try to put it back down, even if she is in the other room, she comes and stacks everything back on top of me again.

And as adorable as this may sound in retelling it, it is something that is currently getting on my nerves.

If I try to go into another room to avoid the shrill loudness of either of them, if I am in the kitchen getting anything for them, either or both of them are clinging to my leg and I KID YOU NOT I am afraid I am going to get hurt because they don't afford me the space to move about safely.

STEP AWAY FROM THE MOM!

It has been days, if not WEEKS since I have had moments to myself. Or for Charlie. So it will still be quite some time before I get a quiet - untouched - ungroped moment to myself. Who knows what I will do with it? I have so many lists of things I want to accomplish from laundry to photo shoots to learning more about this whole blogging thing, and all these lists of things we NEED to buy when our next paycheck comes in, and all these lists of things I only WISH I could afford and these things are not even all that frivolous, really.

I mean is a pair of jeans that fits in a way that doesn't make me want to spend ANOTHER day in my yoga pants or a bra my girls don't constantly make their way out of too much to ask? Well yes, I guess they are. I would need the time to go somewhere without my children, with extra money, and enough self confidence to keep trying jeans on until I found something that wasn't a hideous distortion of my already challenged 'after baby' body.

I used to go shopping every Friday or whenever I got paid, and I bought skin cream, or make up, or new boots or earrings just something for a jumping off point for some outfit for the weekend. Thank God I spoiled myself then, because it is OVER, I tell you.

And that is just obvious by looking at my tired baggy eyes and my dirty hair wearing the shirt that is the least stained from my closet.

Woah.

I already feel better having gotten that little rant out.

Or maybe my Prozac kicked in.

Seriously, how do you get rid of that eye twitching thing?

Anyhoo, on to the cuteness part of my kids.


Madee received a kid's digital camera for Christmas, and she has been rather interested in it lately. Yesterday, when she had her Baby and was dancing, I said "take a picture with Baby!" and she was all about posing.
She LOVES to dance.

And she put her outfit together. She puts her boots on all by herself now. An sometimes on the right feet!

So, she has this camera an hands me Baby, and says, "Mom! Picture with Baby! Click!"

She kills me with her cuteness. Everyday she acts more and more like me.

From the way she says "Heeeeyyyyy." the way I do when Dad enters the room, and the way she runs to comfort anything that falls to the floor "You okay, Baby?" to the way she covers her mouth when she giggles.

But I am really excited about this 'joy of camera' thing. I am putting batteries in it today so I can start to see what she is seeing. Maybe she will even start a photo post on the blog.